Online social networks are relationship happy meals

Wow. I like that title. I love myself.

Every time I make a connection or a friend on Linkedin, I feel a bit better.
I feel like I made another step towards that Big Big world and the Unknown is sort of shrinking.

I feel more human. I feel like I have friends.
Will you be my facebook friend? Click here.

Sometimes, you look at those people with 500 friends, and you wonder why your life sucks so much. See my post on online loneliness.

And you look at all those people who had fun, show their holiday pictures, the nice people they hang out with, and the comments they have on their walls, like "Oh boy, were you wasted yesterday!"

Last week, I needed to get new connections.
I tried some bulk friending.
Not very high return.
But recommendation yielded some good results. Warm calling worked so much better better.

After infiltrating the web, it was hard to "seal" the relationships.
Real life, did that perfectly.

So as a conclusion:
- find the right people within social networks.
- approach them via recommendation
- get the relationship going with real life presence.

Example:
You are in a club.
- Your friend tells you he found the prettiest girl next to the bar.
- You go talk to her with your "I am awesome" T-shirt
- You steal her wallet and start the conversation.

This is what you would want to do to have girls literally chasing you.
Guaranteed.

My most popular posts. Lazy blogging.

Ok, here's my crunch of Marketing millionaire so far...

My quest to being a marketing millionaire
Telling what the paths to millionaire are, and why I've chosen this one.

How to pretend you are busy at work
Title says all.

The MacDuck inpiration
Learn about my role model. Oncle Picsou or Scrooge McDuck.

How to crash into parties
I give some tricks in this post on how to look cool in parties where you know nobody.
Had some good feedbacks on the this one.

How to survive in Koh-Lanta
I just like this one because it is very cynical. I just explain a few tricks on how to get rid of other Koh Lanta contestants.

Why audit and consulting firms use a ponzi scheme
Get the new young guys do the job for you.

Online loneliness
Ex girlfriends on facebook, keep or get rid.
Facebook is a subject I like to talk about. It's mostly because I discovered social networking with facebook.

Oh by the way... don't forget to suscribe to this blog. You can get news from me from your news aggregator or directly in your inbox.

Just be lazy.

Domain names. Freedom. At last.

As most of you may know, in spring 2009 something HUGE is happening.
You want to be there.
You want to see that happen.
I'd like to see the guy who asked me $50000 for Tadaa.com

There is a big change in the world of domain names.

Now the extensions will not be limited to those standard extensions like .com or .net.
Now you can have anything you want! If proposed.

I guess I'll have to be fast for vinh.ly (is ly a common word?)
I guess there will be a rush of the likes we haven't seen for a long time.

First come first served? Bidding process?
Can I buy Coca.cola? (is cola a common word?)

Is it going to change for SEOs? Will porn.porn be a good domain for search?
I would not want to be Sedo which specializes in domain name sales and negotiation.

The prices of domains must have dropped so much... and we'll soon have company names that will be pronounced. (Zobzee, Jaxtr, etc)

To lock a brand and the related domain names will be a big work though.
That's huge, and everyone should be on the starting blocks.

I am.

Linkedin, read between the lines

When you use Linkedin, you just think that achiving success is easy.
Yes, everyone is a top class CEO, a consultant who changed the world or someone who sold aircraft as if those were bread (french expression).

Avoid overpitching

If your product is that good, would you spend so much time pitching it? Do you have time to deal with all those useless queries, because you're so busy dealing with the hottest start-ups right now?
Leave openings, give advice to people on how to contact you (because too many people do, of course) and tell them they better be good.

That makes people want to work with you anyway. Play hard to get.

Make a difference

After browsing hundreds of profiles, you go directly to the interesting points, and a little bit of humor or personal touch, does the trick.
You're different. Just build a relationship.
People bet on people, not resumes.

Look at wordings

What does "achieve success" mean? Is there something measurable like 35% revenue increase? Do you feel that the profile you're seeing is too perfect? Dig. Look at people who had the same job, and what they put forward.
Then you have a better idea of what is NOT said.

Everything is just a hint

Why is there a year missing?
Why is one job extensively described and another one isn't?
Overall consistency matters most.

Go for it

Don't be shy. Just try to get close to people that will add value to you. Monitor the questions and answers. There is a lot going on on Linkedin, and you don't want to miss the party.

Good use of Linkedin, guys. Don't forget me when you become a millionaire.

Practicing poker makes you a better business person

That's right! Poker rules!

I have been playing a bit lately, with some success, but not huge amounts at stake.
I feel every time I play I learn a bit more about myself.

Yes, poker is not that luck game it used to be portrayed as. The most common variant of poker, which is No-limit Texas Hold'em requires to calculate the odds, to read your opponents and to stay cool under pressure.

People always think that good poker players bluff all the time.
If they did, they would be dead meat.
The businessweek article I just read, shows really good commonalities between poker and business.

What you should keep in mind.
-Have a clear vision of the value of your hand. The potential gain estimation is crucial and you should assess what your opponents have with your limited information.
-Negotiate. And try to get the most with your hand, whatever it is.
-Know when to fold. That's the best lesson I learnt. It's very hard to do that, when you know you have a chance to win. Just stay clear-headed. Always go back to the odds of winning and what you can assess about the other players.
-Listen to the other players and get every information you can. Make them speak.

Business-wise, it's a bit different. As it is said in the article, you still want a win-win situation. You are not thinking about just that deal, you're thinking about the next time you'll meet, or the reputation you'll have.


But still:
poker gives you the habit to deal with high stakes, staying cool under pressure, to maximize your revenue. Business is also about that.

Professional poker players think about their activity about a business. They set their limits, they monitor their profitability, and they have a long-term strategy.

Poker is all about odds and skills. If you play well, it pays in the long run.
I hope business works the same way.

If Poker worked the same way as Business did, the players would team up to get the others out of the table, and share the profits. That's what partnering is about. Remember that in terms of network, you still have the haves and the have not's.

The luck and skills be with you.

Time should not matter that much

Time is our currency.
Consultants share their time, some people invest time in a relationship.
And some people spend some time blogging, still thinking they should be doing something else... hrmmm

Money is sometimes an exchange for time... (like in the movie Cashback, where the guy is just paid for his presence ina Tesco)

So now that we agree that time is more than money,
Are you a greedy person?

Do you feel that your time is worth so much to you, that you should only spend it on things you need ? The things you consider most important?

Wasting time. Just waste time.
Indulge yourself with some time watching the Simpsons, staring at a blank wall or watching your grass grow.

It feels like you have so much time doesn't it?

It's like money. The more you spend, the richer you feel.
When I had a regular salary, I never really felt rich. I just took everything for granted.
But I saw some people, with low paid jobs buying champaign in a club. Those guys were king of the world and I was just having a regular party, like all those parties that happened you don't know when, you don't know where, you don't even recall what you did and who you were with.
And for those guys, it was the night they ordered champaign and soaked all the pretty girls with it.

Now I really enjoy wasting time on money on little things.
That makes life a lot easier, no?

Do you want to work in France?

If that's your question, then you're definitely not asking the right one.
It's not about jobs...
In fact, does france want you to come work ?

Answer the following questions.

1)Are you French?
if "no", remove 50 points

2)Are you European?
if "no", remove 500 points

3)Do you speak french?
if "no", remove 500 points

4)Do you speak english?
if "yes", add 3 points

5)Is your name hard to pronounce?
if "yes", remove 50 points

6)Are you feeling like an entrepreneur?
if "yes", remove 500 points

7)When you hear "strike", do you think about bowling?
if "yes", remove 50 points

8)Do you like good food and wine?
if "yes", add 3 points

9)Do you have a prestigious diploma?
if "yes", add 20 points

10)Did you get your diploma abroad?
if "yes", remove 20 points

11) Was it an engineering school?
if "yes", add 100 points

12)Was it a "Groupe A" school?
if "yes", add 200 points

13) You know all those questions do not matter, because you have the right connections.
if "yes", add 200 points

14)You think the only companies that are worth working for are the SNCF, La Poste, RATP and Gaz de France.
if "yes", add 200 points
if you don't know those companies, remove 200 points

15)The only thing that matters for you is life balance. Having enough holidays to enjoy your life, really.
We don't care what you think.


Add everything. If you have over 600,
Welcome to France!

How to write a post like Sanh Ly

Hey guys, I know some of you read my brother's blog.
He has started his blog way before I did.
I remember I made fun of him at the time, telling him that having a blog was a useless waste of time.
And here I am...

So I thought it was time I told you about "How to make a post like Sanh Ly".

So who is Sanh Ly?








That's him.







(Red nose is added for illustration purpose)



So what is the blog about?


Well most of the time, it's about girls and pictures.
Or pictures of girls. Or engineering school.
So if you want to be able to make a post like Sanh Ly:

- Short titles. If it's more than 3 words, think again! One word works best. Sometimes, use english titles for a classy touch.
- Use pictures. If you don't find meaning, your readers will. Text does not matter. Put a picture of a cat, and don't write anything else.
- Take close ups. They give an intimate look to your pictures. Your readers will think that you are an artist that saw a very touching detail in an everyday object.
- Always use super clean pictures. Even if you catch the moment, you're an artist. You don't want anything blurry on your blog. You show something only if you think it is worth showing.
- Photoshop. Even if you don't want to convey a message, you want to WOW your reader. Use those sophisticated effects to show how professional you are.
- Skin.Show your readers some skin.Everyone likes that.
- Talk about yourself. That's why people come to your blog, they want to hear about you.

So if you want to write like Sanh Ly. You gotta start using your camera, and use all those tips I've told you before.

Disclosure: I have not been paid for this post.

Crap cannon, the brown note is a tasteless joke

Once again,

Take something scary,
Take something disgusting,
Take something tasteless,

Mix everything again, and you've got something sticky. (no bad joke implied)

Strong rumors about an infrasonic note could get someone to release his bowels against his will. It could even be used to control a crowd.

Imagine such a humiliating procedure to control a crowd, imagine how you would feel in that situation.

I can't help but show, once again, my South Park culture. Poetry amateurs, that was nice seeing you stop by.



But you should not be worried about that. Experiments proved it wrong, with famous TV show mythbusters.
Worst wase scenario, slight chest discomfort.

But the virality of such a phenomenon is once again motivated on FEAR (like cell phones making popcorn), but more than that: on something vulgar.

Vulgarity touches something taboo in our brain... You can not talk about excrements. Your mother told you not to. But when you were a kid, those were a part of you, and you were proud of it.

Now you have all those mixed feelings for it, and the only way out is just to laugh about it. But you have, once again a morbid curiosity.

Aim low, aim large audience. That's our common denominator.

It's happening! WoWoW really creates a new experience.

You know WoW? It's short for World of Warcraft, and it's a Blizzard game, which is a Vivendi company which is French. (Cocorico!).

Just felt I had to mention this, before going on.

So it's basically a massive multi-role online playing game (MMORPG).
(for old people (more than 30), those kids stay in front of a screen, they act like knights and monsters and pretend to fight in front of a screen.)

Big hit. Huge success.
Being a enormous fan of South Park, I can't resist showing you one of the references they make to the game.

Here's what regular practice leads to. (reminds me of engineering school)





But the concept goes further.
It's the world of world of warcraft.

I would believe this to be a hoax (because this is too cool), but look at that!
You can experience a clear Mise en abime of yourself experiencing the game.

Just take a look.






Imagine seeing yourself enjoying the game.
You would then think that you really are enjoying the game.

Then you'd wonder if you're not the player in the game being played by someone else.
This would be the end of the world of world of warcraft as we know it.

Make popcorn with your cell phone: Virality in action

Take something scary.
Take something yummy.
Take a urban legend.

Mix everything and you get classic but very effective internet buzz. With a very fast propagation.

Demonstration:



Updated: The videos were made by Cardos. They're making headsets. And boy, did that work!












All that started with different versions of the same video.
These videos show how you can make popcorn with your mobile phone.
Quite amazing if you think about what it does to your head and brain.

By watching those videos, you wonder what you have been doing all those years.



But those are FAKES.
The virality has already been proven when cell phones were supposed to cook eggs.

But FEAR shortcuts everything else. When your FEAR switch is on, you don't care haw many emails you have to read, how much work you have to do... you just have to know.

Your morbid curiosity has a high click through rate.
And you know this could be possible. You could make popcorn with your cell phone.

After all, why not?

You can do it with your oven. And yes you've been told it could be harmful, but there's a conspiracy up there who does not want you to know.
There are reports somewhere, you heard about those.

If you knew you would not be using your cell phone. (even for making popcorn).
So those big cell phone companies like NOKIA, or popcorn companies (yeah that's also their bread and butter) would not be making money any more.
That's why they lie!

FEAR is the best motivator. Remember FEAR marketing can destroy a brand (imagine if NOKIA were the cell phones incriminated), or make one (blue M&Ms are like Viagra).

How to find ebooks!

These days, I have been very busy reading e-books.

That's so obvious you don't want to reinvent the wheel every time.
To believe that you have one person's lifetime knowledge condensed into a few pages makes you read more and more.

Most of the time, when americans write those, their writing style is so much readable than french writers.
The style is more direct, straight to the point, structured, repetitive and therefore well suited for good learning practice.

You can find e-books on everything on the internet, whether it is lockpicking, martial arts, social awareness, getting taller :)

Most people would download those e-books via torrents, or on knowfree.net, or simply use the "filetype:pdf NAMEOFBOOK"

And now, with no link to what I just wrote:

The Florida Toulouse (Pink & White), was bad. A very bad experience.
And actually I got at least one visitor, who was wondering about that party and accidentally got my review.

Ah, sweet revenge...

Florida Toulouse. Nul. Nul. Nul.

Okay. Title says all.
Yesterday, I was supposed to attend a a party at the Florida (in Toulouse) place du Capitole. The dress code was "Pink and white". I even got an invite.
So we were there. First in line. There was quite a queue.
So with all the VIPs, people with special passes, regular guys like us could not come in, even with regular invites.
The girl I came with got fed up, some of my friends weazled in, but finally we went away and had a great evening in another bar.

Okay... I am telling you about details of my life. That's true. But there could be some points about that post.
-Show you example of marketing. "Le Florida" in Toulouse (Place du Capitole), does not need regular people like me. They want those people who matter. Or would feel special if they manage to get in. So looking at people standing outside trying to get in was all part of that marketing. So get your customers in, and feel special, and get the others help you do the marketing. They had people in pink and white everywhere outside to do the marketing for them. And they have absolutely no consideration for you whatsoever.
-Engage with my readers. Yes that's my life. I'm like you. I don't get in... I didn't even like that place in the first place. (everyone told me it was crappy anyway).
-I give them bad publicity (and still will). I hope that when someone types Florida and Toulouse in google, he finds that post and knows what a crappy place that is.

Yes I'm angry. But I still had a great evening outside... One of the best for a long time I must say.

Updated: VDM

1+1=1

Just a little thought.
We have always been saying that 1+1 should be 3, because of synergies.
Because the first 1 is different from the first 1, so that's why they make 3.
3 means more complexity, that it's more difficult to get a project achieved, because you have communication problems. So I think that this equation does not reflect the reality because the first 1 should be different from the second 1.

Jean-Claude Van Damme said 1+1=11. And he's right. You put two ones together, and because they're different, they don't mix. That's the normal case.

1+1=1. That's the best case, those two 1s understand each other and can communicate, so that they can become another being.

So those three 1s are different.

You would say "Hey, the result is not accurate".
And you're right. And you're right.
Two rights make a right.
1+1=1

I rest my case.

Bloggers and community, who controls who?

Who are the bloggers?
Bloggers are passionate people. At least they should be.
They are completely wired to everything that's happening, trying to get fresher than fresh news. They live in the moment. They see trends, but they are overloaded with all that information.
Most of them can't keep up any more. They say there's too much too follow. Too much to read, too many changes.

Being a high frequency blogger. I wouldn't do that.

Thinking about the next generation of blog, I feel something that's going to be mashupy. Very mashupy.
Only bits of stuff you'll see anywhere, you'll have caught with your mobile phone and your voice being texted. People can track where you are, read your cell phone messages, and control your TV channel, vote whether you should take chocolate ice cream or vanilla.

They would debate around the flavour and the blogger would take the sponsor's choice.

That's life. With great powers, come great reponsibilities.
When you have thousands of people looking at you, you should be careful.

Internet Newspeak

There's whole linguo coming with internet business.

Everyone used to be Web2.0. To be trendy, you had to be something else and use very marketing words like "user centric", "share the love", "evangelist" and all those are clearly the signs that you belong to the right tribe.

Now money is such a bad word. Return on investment (ROI) is something for financiers and VC. Entrepreneurs should just try to add value to the community and be useful. Money shouldn't be an entrepreneur concern. Like Twitter, Be useful! Be creative! Make something that people want! Spread the love!
Money is not important, and anyway it'll come later.

Bullshit.

Money is the blood of every economy. If you don't have money in mind when trying to do something big... You might as well play with an electric train in your parents'attic.

Money makes you happy. It buys success, skills, and good looks.
Friends like it, employees love it.

But let's keep in mind that customer satisfaction is just a mean to get money in.

If you say passion is the most important, you can consider money like a way to fuel your pa$$ion.

¥€$$$, pa$$ion matt€r$$.
That was a post sponsored by the Capitalist Economy.

Ex girlfriends on facebook, keep or get rid?

That must have happened to you, but now I have a fair amount of ex girlfriends in my facebook contacts.

What should I do with that?
Quite frankly, you always have that strange reaction when you see such a well known face in your contact... The good thing is that you don't have to look falsely ecstatic when meeting her back. "Oh how are you doing? Great! Oh You are moving in with your new boyfriend! That's great news! You can't know how thrilled I am". And you keep on babbling until you find a way out for a "meeting with friends" but it was nice seeing her, you say it would be nice having a drink...

Until you realize that should not be something you should wonder about.

With facebook, you can track everything in you mini-feed without even asking for it.
Why do they tell you that your ex-girlfriend is listed as single again.
another one got married. You see her husband's page. You see posts of his ex girlfriends on his wall posts.
Your insane stalking goes on, and you want to know EVERYTHING. Another ex did not know how to set her visibility setting, and without knowing, she could also be tracked without being in anyone's contact, but suscribing to the wrong network.

And you hate to see one of them putting you in the limited profile list.

You wonder what kind of past experience your girlfriend has.
So you keep looking at her wall posts, draw social graphs, to see specific group of friends and try to understand how they met and how long they stayed.

Well, that could be a good facebook app: rate my ex.
You display picture of your ex, and you ask people to rate them.

Pheww. Sorry, just a moment of insanity.
Of course, I really never did that, because I don't have time for that.
But a twisted mind would.

Careful about your visibility.